On Mark 8:14-21

I've been trying to read the Bible in a year (like I've been trying to do for the past few years). I never actually succeed, but I figure that if I do it for about 10 days every year I should be able to get through a large chunk of it, anyway.

Something really stuck out at me this afternoon as I was reading Mark 8. Jesus has just fed 5,000, then 4,000, with meager amounts of bread, on two separate occasions. Reminds me of the church potluck where there doesn't seem to be a lot there (it HAS happened!) and somehow everyone ends up gluttonously full, carting home their own leftovers and those their neighbor has pushed upon them.

Those stories always amaze me--how much more they must have amazed Jesus' disciples and all those who were present!

With that in mind, here's Mark 8:14:  "Now the disciples had forgotten to bring any bread; and they had only one loaf with them in the boat." My immediate reaction: What idiots! One would think they'd start learning how to prepare for the crowds they were encountering....or at least bring along enough food for the trip!!

I read on. Jesus said something that was obscure to me about the yeast of the Pharisees and the yeast of Herod, which must have been equally obscure to the disciples, because they replied, "It is because we have no bread!" (read: Yeah, Jesus, duh! We have no bread because Mr. Airhead Simon (or whomever) forgot to pack it! That's what we're complaining about!) 

At this point, I'm pretty sure Jesus did a massive facepalm. He started rebuking his disciples, saying stuff like, "Do you have eyes and fail to see? Do you have ears and fail to hear?" (read: You eedjits!) He reminds them about the two huge miracles concerning bread that he had JUST done. "Do you not yet understand?" he implores.

He must have been feeling like I did sometimes (okay, often) as a teacher, giving specific, step-by-step directions, like "Pick up your pencil," and being met with blank stares and, "Uh...I don't get it. What do you mean by 'pick up your pencil'?" Here he had been doing such awesome miracles, urging people not to tell about them, which they couldn't keep quiet if they had tried, and his own disciples are complaining because they had forgotten to bring along food for themselves and didn't know what they would do....

Then I think about my own life and am humbled. I think about all God has done for me: like how in college I thought I'd have to move into the dorms for an undisclosed amount of time, then to the apartment, and the apartment unexpectedly opened up early; like how I thought I'd be single the rest of my life if I didn't abandon my convictions, and somehow Jon and I bumblingly met each other. Like how I thought we'd be stuck in town because of land prices, and somehow the sellers of our new property accepted our absurdly low offer. Like how I was afraid I'd have to send my baby to a day care and go to work outside the home, and somehow I'm able to stay at home with Matthias.

You'd think after a while I'd get the picture and quit worrying because I forgot to "bring enough bread" like the disciples did. Jesus is probably doing a facepalm right now. Or maybe He's nicer than I am. He probably is. But what I hear Him telling me is that it wasn't about how much bread the disciples brought. They were human and made stupid mistakes like forgetting to bring food, and He provided for their needs. He continues to provide, despite my own doubts and shortcomings. I need to trust. I need to understand. I will fail at both. And yet He will provide.